Wednesday, February 22, 2012


Hey out there.

Please check out my new blog and become a follower. It's much more focused on my artwork than this clustershit.


Sunday, July 18, 2010

Monkey gif

Just learned you can make gifs within photoshop, can you believe it?

Monday, July 12, 2010

Not Figuratively

I may or may not create more of these. However, this will likely be the only one I do using mspaint and a mouse. Click that shit to enlarge.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

omegle > chat roulette

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: are you horny chick with cam ?
You: milk the nectar
You: yeah
You: milk your nectar on my chest
Stranger: ur msn?
You: my mission is to please
Stranger: what
You: you asked my mission
Stranger: gimme ur msn
Stranger: im wanking
You: to please
Stranger: i want to see u and cum
You: Send me some cum
You: I will use it
Stranger: sure
Stranger: first make me cum
You: okay nectar bringer
You: I thirst for the holy nectar
Stranger: yea
Stranger: give me ur msn
You: okay, where do we go from here
Stranger: i wanna watch u and cunt
You: my mission is to please you baby
You: mmmm i want you to watch me and cunt
Stranger: cum
Stranger: babe
Stranger: do it
Stranger: fast
You: okay i'll do it and cunt
You: i'll
You: do
You: it
You: and
You: cunt
Stranger: yea
Stranger: or yahoo
Stranger: give me
Stranger: msn
You: place your member on my flesh mounds
You: aka breastfeedes
You: *feeders
You: ever feed on tit nectar?
You: nourishing
You: to say the lease
You: *least
You: sorry can't type, i have a sculpture of your dick in my hand
You: i've been sculpting it since this conversation began
You: Certain personality traits reveal a lot about your boner shape
You: i'm thinkin' big and thick
You: and full of nectar
Stranger: i wanked]
Stranger: and all necter came out
You: oh good
Stranger: woo
You: okay, could you send me some of the nectar
You: that's very essential to my mission
Stranger: ok
Stranger: lick it all
Stranger: bahha
You: well, that's not on the addendum
You: but if we end up with some extra time i'll consider
Stranger: i wacthed
Stranger: cam in
Stranger: adultfriendfinder site
You: did you find an adult friend?
You: other than myself
You: jesus, how many adult friends have you found
You: i feel dirty
Stranger: what
Stranger: i dont give fuck abt request
Stranger: i just use that site to see cam
You: do you see cum?
You: so you watch the cam and pretend I am the person on the cam?
Stranger: i like
Stranger: to wank seing cam
Stranger: rather than watchinfg porn
You: i don't understand
Stranger: hmm
Stranger: nvm
Stranger: where are u from? and are u old?
You: I come from within the earth and I am older than you could ever imagine
You: I predate man
You: and I am cumming
You: and it feels so good
Stranger: i know right
Stranger: nth feels good than that
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: age>
You: nth feels good than that is right
Stranger: ??
You: twenty somethin' if you catch my drift
You: I'm in my young teens
Stranger: i see
Stranger: whats ur age
Stranger: dont be too confusing
You: 15 and a half
Stranger: i rarelly understand what u english is not good
You: 17 in 6 months
Stranger: 15 and half? wtf
Stranger: really?
You: mostly
You: well, mainly
Stranger: u sound like old woman of abt
Stranger: 34
Stranger: who likes man slaves
Stranger: hahahahaa
You: I have older woman sensibilities
You: my love for slave men is part of my love for dystopian sci-fi
Stranger: haha
Stranger: cant understand
Stranger: but i cant
Stranger: believe u r 16 yrs old
You: well how old are you?
You: I'm probably about the same age
Stranger: same age??
Stranger: with ehom?
Stranger: whom
You: same age as you
You: probably
You: what kind of age do you look for in a potential lover
Stranger: u think i am 16 yrs old kidd?
Stranger: lol
Stranger: i am 18
You: i'm trying to figure out how old I am
Stranger: little girl
Stranger: 19
Stranger: sorry
You: I am ancient, earthling
You: I predate your species
Stranger: i bet you are typing this advance sentence in order to confuse me
Stranger: u are not like this normally
Stranger: jajajaja
You: pfft, mortals
Stranger: do play computer games like call of duty??
You: i don't play your reindeer games, pal
Stranger: i see
Stranger: i need key code for it
You: I have one
Stranger: i dont have credit card
Stranger: jajaja
You: It's written on the inside of my bottom rib
You: cut my chest open and get it outt
You: that would get me goin'
You: the juices flowin'
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: u know what
Stranger: i just can understand 20% of things u type
Stranger: lol
You: I'm no statician
You: but I'm going to provide some statistics anyway
You: 100% of you is the worst
You: 0% of you is best
Stranger: hmm
Stranger: ok
You: stats make me cum
Stranger: wtf
Stranger: haha i cant understand a bir
Stranger: bit
Stranger: yet ok
Stranger: i am going to play game now
Stranger: bored now
You: have fun with your reindeer games my child
Stranger: yea ppl of 50 yrs age also play those reindeer games
Stranger: its so cool indeed
You: okay lets end this
Stranger: and i joked little old lady...i am not horny guy bahahaha
Stranger: k it was nice..=) see u next time here if chance
You: fuck you
You: i thought you were horny
You: that's fucked up
Stranger: u r not that lucky to fuck me
Stranger: =)
Stranger: my friend
You: I am fuming
Stranger: hahaha
You: you said you were fucking horny
You: this is bullshit
Stranger: u were cumming and now u wre fuming:P
Stranger: yea i lied..
Stranger: sorry
Stranger: i did big mistake?
Stranger: :S
You: you did big mistake buddy
You: BIG mistake
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: probably
Stranger: but what mistake
Stranger: u dint showed anything
You: disconnect
Stranger: or else
Stranger: :D
Stranger: ok see u nxt time
Stranger: old lady
You: disconnect from my life
Stranger: lets kill some nazis
You: disconnect from this life
Stranger: haha
Stranger: nope
You: world at war is horrible
Stranger: i love my life
Stranger: thanks for ur support
Stranger: i like ur kindness for horny guys
Stranger: hahaha
You: fuckin' worst
Stranger: lol
Stranger: sorry
Stranger: my teenager friend
Stranger: haha
Stranger: are u really 15??
You: I was born July 13th of the year 15
Stranger: yesterday was my birthday
You: i hope you wept all day
Stranger: wept? means?
You: and wrestled with the blues
You: cried
You: like a coward
Stranger: no i just wasted my money
Stranger: and got a new car
Stranger: wanna see in cam>
Stranger: ?
Stranger: im right inside it now
Stranger: jajaja
Stranger: i got very less ppl do celebreate birthday coz i have no free time mostly
You: You have no friends because you are the worst? okay, that's cool
Stranger: no not worst
Stranger: i have friend
Stranger: but they dont meet my class
Stranger: i dont like hanging around with ordinary ppl
Stranger: jajajajaa
Stranger: i dont mean in that way
Stranger: but hmm
Stranger: yea
You: what kind of people do you like hanging around with
Stranger: hmmm
Stranger: mostly with girls
Stranger: rich chicks
Stranger: and my dad's friends
Stranger: like VIP's
You: rich chicks and your dad's VIP friends
You: sounds like a crowd of garbage people
Stranger: haha for u may be
You: I hope they stab you to death at a party
Stranger: but they are awesome
You: in front of a bunch of partiers
You: and the partiers come up
Stranger: my dad's fren's gifted me ferrarri
Stranger: u can see if u want in cam
Stranger: they are cool
Stranger: dont say them garbage
Stranger: loll
You: and pour beer on your corpse and reminisced on how shitty of a person you were
You: and they'll all quickly come to agreement that you were the worst person on the planet
Stranger: hahaha
You: and that your loss was a great help to mankind
Stranger: why are u mad wth me?
You: and this would cause them to party twice as hard
You: They party till the sun comes up
Stranger: thanks
Stranger: same to u my friend
You: and when it rises into the sky, they fall asleep on each other
Stranger: =))
You: and wake up hours later
Stranger: i hope that will happen with ppl in yr circle
You: and somebody remembers that you died the night before
Stranger: =)
You: and word gets around
You: and everybody remembers you are dead
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: wtf
You: and, though they had planned to go home
You: they start partying again
You: and they laugh at a slideshow of your life
Stranger: u know whats the history of ur evolution?
Stranger: lmfao
Stranger: i got story
Stranger: :P
Stranger: yea
Stranger: god was making you
Stranger: and he got emerngency call
Stranger: and now what to do?? work was incomplete
Stranger: he just throwed u in this earth in half completed work with no brains and shit life
Stranger: thinking u can be a joke to ppl
Stranger: and make them laugh
Stranger: ***the end***
Stranger: :P:PP
Stranger: hjahahahha
You: God was making you and half way through he dropped you and jerked off on you
You: he picked you up and poot you on the cookie sheet
You: and as he slid you into the oven, he laughed to himself
You: and his wife came in and said "honey, what's so funny?"
You: and he opened the oven and showed her you on the baking sheet
You: and she burst into laughter
You: and exlaimed "Dear, I think that's the worst one you've ever made"

Friday, February 12, 2010

Omegle tyme

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Heh, what's up
Stranger: not much. the sky, ect.
You: Yo, you wanna get out of here?
Stranger: yeah.
You: Hop in
You: *pulls up in cock shaped car*
You: hop in my fuckin cock shaped car puta
Stranger: oh im in it babe
You: Alright lets get the fuck outta here
You: *does a brody*
Stranger: sick wheels babe
You: Thanks faggot
Stranger: where we heading?
You: lets kiss
Stranger: lets fuck
You: We're going by my mom's place
You: I have to pick up some diapers
Stranger: can she come with us?
You: There's a baby coming out of my cunt
Stranger: fair enough
You: and i need to put it in a diaper so I can get rid of it
You: Look
You: I'll finish giving birth and we can get rid of the baby
You: toss it off the bridge on our way to mom's
Stranger: can we kill it then rape its dead body?
You: then you can get up in my guts with your peenstick
You: we can kill it, but don't get your dick near my son
You: I'll still care for him like a normal mother
Stranger: i dont have a dick you bitch
You: Well put your private skin into me
Stranger: nah thanks imma gonna get my taxi and leave
You: No taxi is going to come near your sorry ass
You: covered in baby guts and my cunt gore
Stranger: shit, *pulls out rape whistle*
You: get real
Stranger: oh baby i am
You: so where to shitter
Stranger: yes yes indeed
You: where are we going
You: we've been sitting in my car forever
Stranger: your place my place
You: alright *brodies*
Stranger: i dont care i want you BAD
You: oh shit, I forgot I gotta stop by my mom's
Stranger: hurry up!!
You: Hey mom!
You: Here for the diapers
You: this is my faggot friend from the internet
You: Ignore him/her
Stranger: hey
You: *grabs diapers*
You: *fills pockets with diapers*
You: *opens frige and grabs a slice of leftover pizza
You: *walks back into the car*
Stranger: hey can u hurry up...
You: I got these diapers so we could cum in them
Stranger: excellent ;)
You: Alright *hands you a diaper*
You: cum in that for me, I'm hungry
Stranger: sure here you go
You: put your snack in the fuckin' diaper
You: i'm jonesin' for sum'n to munch on
Stranger: it is you dumb shit
You: Oh alright, hold the wheel
You: *presses diaper against face*
You: *slurping sounds*
Stranger: *throws up in corner*
You: This is the worst cum I've ever tasted
You: I've never had bad cum
You: didn't know it existed
Stranger: *car swerves *
Stranger: *you die*
You: Your dick makes the worst cum
Stranger: thats cos i dont have oe babe
Stranger: *one
You: Well whatever that is
You: it makes horrible cum
You: you should change your diet
You: *pulls over*
You: get the fuck out of my car, go on
You: come on, get outta my car
You: take your terrible cum with youy
Stranger: im already gone
You: *spits cum into kleenex*
You: *throws it out the window towards you*
You: *brodies off*
Stranger: lol good times
You: *flips the bird*
Stranger: yeh you bore me
Stranger: you american mommy's boy or girl
You: I'm african
Stranger: i mean diapers dont even exist in my country
You: sounds like a shithole
Stranger: hahahh see what yu did there
Stranger: its not btw
Stranger: its AMAZING
Stranger: ur jealous
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

omegle conversations

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: @lewisusher/jellybean?
You: yes
Stranger: yes what?
You: yes, jellybean please Signed, Lewis Usher
Stranger: here you go
You: oh thanks idiot
Stranger: what?
You: I was thanking you, idiot
Stranger: why am i idiot
Stranger: ?
You: you tell me stupid
Stranger: gaar meanie
Stranger: your not really lewis are you?
You: don't tell me who i am and who i amn't
Stranger: are you lewis though?
Stranger: ?
You: I am
You: and I amn't
Stranger: ok well if you are then you need to know that im @Bondie09
You: roger
Stranger: roger?
You: I can't believe you wanted to talk to a stranger
Stranger: i didnt i wanted to talk to lewis
You: lewis is strange
Stranger: who r u? are you roger?
You: I'm the nectar from your boner
You: the wind for your peen
Stranger: but im not a guy
You: you can have boner nectar and not be a guy
You: women are comprised of 28 percent boner nectar
You: that's actually more than guys
Stranger: umm what?!
Stranger: if you arent lewis then im gone
You: honey, have a seat
Stranger: im sitting
You: I'm going to tell you something
You: and it's not going to be easy
You: but keep in mind that it's the truth
Stranger: ok
Stranger: shhot
You: I'm not
Stranger: shoot*
You: ....
You: I.... I'm not Lewis
Stranger: nooooooo!
Stranger: thats sad sad new
Stranger: s
Stranger: but you have been fun
Stranger: twitter?
You: are you asking me if I twitter?
You: like twitter my vagina?
Stranger: tyes
You: yes, at night
Stranger: lol
Stranger: whats your twitter
You: it's a horizontal twitter of sorts, strong focus on clitoral stimulation]
Stranger: umm ok
Stranger: whats your @
Stranger: your twitter @
You: I my twitter is usually at home
You: in bed or otherwise
You: usually in bed
Stranger: no whats your name on twitter
You: my name is the same as it is when I'm not twittering
You: it's not changed at all
Stranger: lol ur funny
You: I don't understand
Stranger: why?
You: explain everything you know
You: i'm confused
Stranger: ok one sec
Stranger: i know that im pretty cool and your funny and my tongue feels salty and i had subway for lunch, lizards can grow their tails back and umm jelly beans rock
You: you were the girl in juno, no?
You: loves it
Stranger: i unfortunately was not
You: you lie hahaha *flirts*
Stranger: haha oh you
You: we're great friends now, i like it
You: hey so what's your mom been up to?
You: yeah just goin to school
You: .... workin'
Stranger: yes we are like bffls
Stranger: yeah my mums being doin stuff
You: right on, that's good to hear
You: you guys still livin' in the same place?
You: yeah, yeah, no I totally feel ya
Stranger: yeah saame place same time u?
You: yeah
Stranger: good good
Stranger: hows your brother? (do you have a brother?)
You: no i lost my family in the tsunami, you know that
You: how rude
Stranger: omg im so sorry i just forgot coz your taking it so well
Stranger: oh crap imma have to go do you have twitter coz if you do follow me @Bondie09 and ill follow you then we'll talk
You: follow me home
You: so i can rape you
Stranger: no lol
You: trying to get me to follow YOUR twitter?
Stranger: yes
You: no, right on that's cool
You: no, i totally feel you
Stranger: kk well follow be and yeah
Stranger: me*
You: yeah I'll hang out on your page
You: probably most of the day tomorrow
Stranger: yeah you do that matey
You: kay
Stranger: bye bye now
You: well okay
You: goodbye then
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: female with msn and webcam?
You: yes that describes me well
Stranger: whats ur msn?
You: who wants to know?
Stranger: me
You: state your name potential cyber-sex candidate
Stranger: phil
You: I need something to work with here if we're gonna do this
You: phil, that's a miserable faggot's name
You: give me a fake one, that'll have to do
You: We'll call you cumstain gaypoops
You: it's less gay than Phil
Stranger: ok :L
You: so I'll start
You: i'm all out of faith
You: this is how i feel
You: i'm laying naked on your floor spreading my vag
You: make your move
Stranger: do this on msn?
You: I dont' have that in my country
Stranger: webcam?
You: i might be able to dig one up
You: i'm surrounded by junk
Stranger: lol
You: it's hard to even hear you through all this junk
Stranger: do u have any pics?
You: yes i have pictures, yes
You: pictures of me i presume?
You: yes i have those
Stranger: can i see some :)
You: I can send you some of my favorite pictures
Stranger: ok :D
You: it's all part of
Stranger: hmmm
You: I'll build up to the pictures of me
You: and start off with my favorites
Stranger: cool
You: okay this next one is my fave band
You: try it on for size
You: in your browser
Stranger: can i have a pic of u?
You: i get to show you 20 more of my favorite pics
You: then you unlock mepics
Stranger: ok
You: okay, but I need to ask you questions about each one so I know you looked at it
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
or save this log or send us feedback.

Friday, October 9, 2009

Exerpt from the short story Blagdaross by Lord Dunsany

And then there spoke the piece of an old cord. "I was made in a place of doom, and doomed men made my fibres, working without hope. Therefore there came a grimness into my heart, so that I never let anything go free when once I was set to bind it. Many a thing have I bound relentlessly for months and years; for I used to come coiling into warehouses where the great boxes lay all open to the air, and one of them would be suddenly closed up, and my fearful strength would be set on him like accurse, and if his timbers groaned when first I seized them, or if they creaked aloud in the lonely night, thinking of woodlands out of which they came, then I only gripped them tighter still, for the poor useless hate is in my soul of those that made me in the place of doom. Yet, for all the things that my prison-clutch has held, the last work that I did was to set something free. I lay idle one night in the gloom on the warehouse floor. Nothing stirred there, and even the spider slept. Towards midnight a great flock of echoes suddenly leapt up from the wooden planks and circled round the roof. A man was coming towards me all alone. And as he came his soul was reproaching him, and I saw that there was a great trouble between the man and his soul, for his soul would not let him be, but went on reproaching him.

"Then the man saw me and said, 'This at least will not fail me.' When I heard him say this about me, I determined that whatever he might require of me it should be done to the uttermost. And as I made this determination in my unfaltering heart, he picked me up and stood on an empty box that I should have bound on the morrow, and tied one end of me to a dark rafter; and the knot was carelessly tied, because his soul was reproaching him all the while continually and giving him no ease. Then he made the other end of me into a noose, but when the man's soul saw this it stopped reproaching the man, and cried out to him hurriedly, and besought him to be at peace with it and to do nothing sudden; but the man went on with his work, and put the noose down over his face and underneath his chin, and the soul screamed horribly.

"Then the man kicked the box away with his foot, and the moment he did this I knew that my strength was not great enough to hold him; but I remembered that he had said I would not fail him, and I put all my grim vigour into my fibres and held by sheer will. Then the soul shouted to me to give way, but I said:

"'No; you vexed the man.'

"Then it screamed for me to leave go of the rafter, and already I was slipping, for I only held on to it by a careless knot, but I gripped with my prison grip and said:

"'You vexed the man.'

"And very swiftly it said other things to me, but I answered not; and at last the soul that vexed the man that had trusted me flew away and left him at peace. I was never able to bind things any more, for every one of my fibres was worn and wrenched, and even my relentless heart was weakened by the struggle. Very soon afterwards I was thrown out here. I have done my work."

Saturday, October 3, 2009

New drawlins

This one is a work in progress:

This started off as a contour drawing and I liked the finished product so I decided to add versions of the character to the above drawing.

Oh, and a very brief attempt to add shadow in photoshop:

Friday, September 18, 2009

Marriage and a new drawing.

Hello all you all. Got married the other day, it was excellent. Went on a great old honeymoon in Big Sur. Stayed in a quaint little cabin and explored the forests and beaches of the area (pictures soon?). I made the mistake of watching the movie Antichrist a day before our wedding. Spectacular film, but quite unsettling. Anywho, here's a drawing I did while at the cabin (color/lighting effects courtesy of photoshop).

Monday, September 7, 2009

Little canvas.

Something I drew on a tiny canvas for Megan a few weeks ago.

Quick little mock-up eh?

Monday, August 31, 2009


Little somethin I drew up at 4 in the morning after a wyld nyte.

Monday, August 24, 2009

Quck lil' update.

Hello peenfolk. I bring to you two more recent drawings - neither of which are stellar - and an updated/modified drawing.