Not Figuratively

I may or may not create more of these. However, this will likely be the only one I do using mspaint and a mouse. Click that shit to enlarge.

Marriage and a new drawing.

Hello all you all. Got married the other day, it was excellent. Went on a great old honeymoon in Big Sur. Stayed in a quaint little cabin and explored the forests and beaches of the area (pictures soon?). I made the mistake of watching the movie Antichrist a day before our wedding. Spectacular film, but quite unsettling. Anywho, here's a drawing I did while at the cabin (color/lighting effects courtesy of photoshop).

New drawlin'

70's space alien feller... pen, marker & watercolor.

Jenny McCarthy and a customized VHS Tape.

Listened to the newest episode of SGU today. It was a good one. They frequently bash celebrities who use their fame to push bullshit on the gullible masses, and recently they have focused their efforts towards Jenny McCarthy and her anti-vaccination campaigning. There is a whole lot to be said about that group and their claim that the Thimerosal (mercury-containing compound) found in vaccinations is giving children autism despite there being no scientific evidence to support that theory. Sadly her child was diagnosed with autism and naturally she wants somebody to blame, so she hopped on that bandwagon and became a prominent figure of the movement... So on the podcast they pointed out a recent quote of hers regarding botox injections:

"I love Botox, I absolutely love it. I get it minimally, so I can still move my face. But I really do think it's a savior."

So the biotch who has been making a stink over vaccination shots, and consistently reminding the public that mercury is the second most powerful neurotoxin known to man, is praising the number 1 most powerful neurotoxin known to man; Botulinum toxin. (Botox is simply a brand name applied to Botulinum toxin, known also as Botulism.) So they sez, they sez "It's okay to utilize the most powerful neuro-toxin known to man to make you pretty, but it's condemnable to use the second most powerful neuro-toxin to save lives and protect our children from disease."

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Anyway, here's a project I did at work using some white-out, a pen and an old VHS tape found near my desk.

Mature photo manipulation.

At work I found myself thrown into a spontaneous fit of mature artistry. I understood the objectives of all the great painters and it empowered me to contribute to their collection of timeless art. Behold my creation:

Turkey drawing progress.

So about a week ago or maybe more, a friend who I will just refer to as Courtney, female companion of my dear gentlefriend Derek, told me to draw somethin' and when I asked just what I should draw she presented me with this photo:


Most people have seen that my drawing techniques are pretty much incapable of capturing any kind of charm or cuteness, so I did some research (previous post) and took my own swing at the modern turkey as we know it. Here is the current state of the drawing, I wanted to get it scanned in because I will likely ruin it when I add watercolor and/or add a body. Kind of a bad scan, but bear with me. Or shall I say TURKEY with me. No, that's stupid.

(click for big)

Who says you can't teach an old cat new tricks?

I don't think anybody says that. But this post is to make sure nobody ever does.

Our cat-child Katerina (aka Katman) can be a real bitch. She'll meow incessantly for no good reason and scratch things really loudly to wake us up in the morning. I've been training her though. Using a standard plastic spray bottle, I've been squirting her with water every time she gives me lip, and recently I've noticed great improvements. Now when she starts to act up all I have to do is grab the spray bottle and point it at her and she cowers away quietly. I have never felt this powerful in my life. It makes me want to punch something. I'll start with Megan and see how I feel after I'm done. Seeya guys.


Oh yeah, here's another old drawing I did that was colored by the mighty Austin Ivansmith. This was from when I worked at Video Video in Santa Cruz a few years back. It would have disappeared into obscurity had Austin not revitalized it with his skills.

Scan from work 5

Here's another guys.

Scan from work 4

Hey guymen. I just scanned two more of those old pictures I told you about. Remember that talk we had.



and more winged grimfolk...

Scan from work 3

Drew this bad boy during 12 hour overnight shifts, so it has some late-night content... specifically a dick.

So this is how it's gonna be...

Let me preface this post, and this blog, by reminding friends and informing new acquaintances that although I am technically an adult, I am known to frequently display very juvenile forms of humor... I will draw a penis on your things, or give somebody five dollars to pee on your things, etc. So this is a disclaimer of sorts to anybody who may be shocked by the childish nature of some of my drawings or postings in general. I'm thinking that perhaps a family member or mentor of sorts may stumble upon this and be taken aback by some of the more vulgar content. I'm simply keeping my creativity in touch with my youthful foolishness for as long as possible, because soon it will be gone and I will have nothing to offer but portraits of my favorite celebrities and paint-by-numbers of a shoreline or some photos from a trip to the zoo. JUDGE NOT YE!

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Anyhow, I've worked as a video game tester for almost 2 years now. And every so often we have down time at work. So when I find myself waiting for a copy of my game, or just have nothing to do during break time, I often do some doodlin' in my notebook. When I feel I've made something worth keeping, I'll tear it out and throw it in my backpack... So, over the next couple weeks I'm gonna be posting some of these drawings for you gentlepeople to peruse. I'll just pull one from the pile now and scan it... Then I'm gonna go watch the new Battlestar Galactica episode and drink a tasty beerdrink.

Drawing I did at work.

(click thumbnail to enlarge.)